The Divorce In Christians Marriages....

[Wayne Crawford]

Did you know that their are more Christians getting divorce than non-Christians!
Divorce rates among Christian groups:
The slogan: "The family that prays together, stays together" is well known. There has been much anecdotal evidence that has led to "unsubstantiated claims that the divorce rate for Christians who attended church regularly, pray together or who meet other conditions is only 1 or 2 percent". 8 Emphasis ours]. Dr. Tom Ellis, chairman of the Southern Baptist Convention's Council on the Family said that for "...born-again Christian couples who marry...in the church after having received premarital counseling...and attend church regularly and pray daily together..." experience only 1 divorce out of nearly 39,000 marriages -- or 0.00256 percent.
Of course, the good Dr. Tom would say that. I see it as a "CYA" What do you think?

[Joyce Johnson-Stovall]

Divorce rates are up right now, regardless of which religious affiliation is in the household. In the United States, the state of the economy and the job market are contributing factors in the increasing rates of families falling a part. I handle divorce cases here in Arizona and see 5 - 10 potential new clients a week. If there is any commonalities in their experiences, it is the challenges they face in the economy and job market. Of course, if the relationship had strong communications, shared values, goals and strategies, perhaps the relationship would not have been stressed to the breaking point. I have actually never had a couple tell me that they fell apart because they separated from their religious beliefs. I am not disputing Dr. Ellis' comments, but I suspect that Hindu marriages and other religions which have a system where marriage is pre-arranged have even less of a divorce rate than born again Christians.

It is important to keep statistics in perspective including understanding the sampling population and the time period when the data was gathered. We live in odd times right now and I am not sure that any of our previous models are right on target since, for most of us adults living and struggling in this economy, we never imagined that all of the systems we grew up to believe work... real estate... banking... stocks... retirement plans... job market...employment opportunities.... are stressed and currently not working very well for many many people. And those stresses can make even the best of relationships fall apart.... even if you are a born again christian, muslim, catholic or member of the jewish faith.

[Wayne Crawford]

This is not the first time, the US, has had hard times! During the depression of 1929, Christians stayed together. They stood by each other, during the bad times, families stayed because they had a believed that God would see them through that hard time. When the bad time gets big, that's when a marriage should come closer. Right now it takes two people to keep a household going even in the good time. A father and mother has to go to work, just to make ends meet. So having a hard time is not a reason for a divorce!

As for the other religions groups, they have an understanding of placement, and, or positions. We as American Christians have lost that understanding. Men who won't stand up in the position that has been given to them by God. You see it every day, men that are inscepted. They won't use their godhead, but submit to their sinful nature, and not being a Godly husband. Women, who willfully won't places her self under the guiding of her husband, she believed that she is always right. She has been deceived, and she deceives her self. Just something to think about!

[Joyce Johnson-Stovall]

I would certainly agree that during tough times, people need to pull together and not apart. I have not researched divorce rates between 1929 and 2009 so I have no data upon which to comment about whether the percentage of divorces in 1929 is any different than it was in 2009.

I would also agree that there has been an increasing value shift which has affected marriages. Many of our grandparents and great grand parents (for the younger group reading this).... stuck to their guns and their marriages. Most states have implemented a "no fault" divorce system so today's divorcing couple need only admit that the couple suffers "irreconcilable differences" rather than to prove that one of the parties was "at fault".

Because today's marriage can be dissolved without proving that one of the parties cheated, was abusive or caused the marriage to come apart, getting a divorce is easier and less costly. Ease and fees contribute also to divorce as an alternative to remaining in a marriage that is causing misery.

I believe that all of these things contribute to higher divorce rates. I also believe that being a "divorced person" does not carry the negative opinion that it did in 1929; therefore, folks feel much more likely to divorce without penalties from the society around them.

I am not advocatng divorce as a solution to an unworkable relationship. I am simply commenting that there are many factors which contribute to divorce and I am not sure that being Christian...praying or not praying is a contributing factor.... Life factors, the environment, the people, the situation all contribute to whether a marital change is a part of an individual's decision.

I am not ready to suggest that going to church... believing in a higher power... being a Christian rather than a Jew or Muslim will determine whether your marriage will last or fail. And it is ok if our opinions differ. Having this exchange of views can be beneficial to both of us.